For whatever reason, I've decided it's time to do away with my anonymity. A few people have guess some things about me, and a few have asked questions. I'm at a point where I don't feel I need to hide who I am and it will be easier for me to respond occasionally with more disclosure.

My name is Ted Eckert and I'm a engineer at Microsoft. Specifically, I'm responsible for the safety certification and energy certification of Microsoft's consumer products. Why is my desktop covered in Surface products? I get the UL Listing and CB reports for them. The same goes for Surface Hub, HoloLens and Xbox. I also get ENERGY STAR certifications for Surface and I handle the European energy regulations for Xbox. Yes, my job requires me to play Xbox to test how much power it consumes while gaming. (I play Forza Horizon games specifically for this testing, but that's a personal preference.)

When everybody was trying to get an Xbox Series X, I had a lab full of them. I've got piles of consoles going back to the 2008 Xbox 360 sitting around, along with controllers and accessories. While many people wonder what the future holds for VR, I get to play with HoloLens regularly. I'm the guy who did the safety certification for that as well.

Do you want to know what's coming for Surface or Xbox? Too bad; I can't and won't talk about it. I like my job and I'm not going to lose it by disclosing confidential information.

Do you want to complain about Windows? Go right ahead. I work on hardware and not software, and whatever you hate about the software isn't my fault.

I'm not going to jump into conversations where people complain about Microsoft products. I work for the company and any response I make is biased. Do you prefer Apple products? It's not my place to say your are wrong. I know there are people here who prefer Linux and that is fine too. I'm not going to push Edge or Bing on anybody who doesn't want them. (If you have a Windows computer, Microsoft is probably already sending you more than enough reminders that they want you to use them.) Do you like the PlayStation over Xbox? That's fine too. Sure, There is nothing wrong with Nintendo either. I've got a lot of friends at Sony Interactive Entertainment and Nintendo and competition is good for everyone. Do you want to make jokes about the Zune? Go ahead. The Zune HD was one of my first programs after I was hired by Microsoft. I'll own up to that if you want to make it the butt of your jokes. I did not work on the KIN phone though, and that was probably the biggest product and marketing failure I've seen since I've been at Microsoft. I did get to work on the original Surface which wasn't a great success.

It's not all work and no play. My avocation is distance running. I'm a member of the Marathon Maniacs, and I've run 115 marathons and ultras so far. I prefer trail runs over pavement. That's partly because I don't want to get hit by a car again and partly because I enjoy being in the forest and mountains. I'm in a neighborhood on the outskirts of Seattle, and I regularly jog from my front door to the peak of Tiger Mountain and back. It's ended up being hiking up hill and jogging down as I've gotten older. Now that I'm in my mid-50s, it's hard jogging 2500 vertical feet over a 3 mile trail. I live in the eastern suburbs of Seattle off I-90, so I spend a lot of time on the trails between Seattle and Snoqualmie pass. I've probably been up most of the peaks that overlook the highway.

I think the only other Oppo I've met is @AestheticsInMotion who once delivered a package to my door. That was years ago, before he moved up in the world of delivery.

Ask me any questions you want about Microsoft, product safety, energy efficiency, or distance running.

@mastermario
Great. This is just what we need. You order your car online only to find out it's a cheap imitation from some seller that disappears overnight. You only find out when the Homda Civik appears in your driveway.

You thought that getting a home south of Everett would be out of your price range, but there are options! 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, 2064 square feet and only $200K.

There are beautiful views to the valley below.

It's the perfect handyman's special! I recommend starting with a retaining wall.

If the price is too high, make an offer on the house next door.

@ForSweden said in A perplexing convoy:

@EssExTee that's CIA

It's definitely the CIA. People have caught onto their black ops, so they have moved to brown ops.

A photographer caught Ott Tanak and Martin Jarveoja in Finland when they were well above the ground.

At least somebody gives out tickets to drivers who go slow in the left lane.

Either a lot of people have moved to my neighborhood from the UK, Australia or New Zealand, or people in my neighborhood have given up on trying to park well.

I'm getting tired of having drivers pull out of a space from the wrong side of the street and almost hit me because they couldn't see around the vehicle in front of them and their side mirror is facing the wrong way to see oncoming traffic.

My local police department is generally only giving parking tickets for serious violations, such as parking in a handicapped space without a permit. On one hand, I would like to see occasional parking enforcement. On the other, I don't mind that my local police really do focus on the major issues and aren't trying to raise revenue through parking and traffic tickets.

If you made it this far through my rant, I'll reward you with an E28 that parked correctly. They even turned the wheels the right direction when parked facing uphill.

I hate that it took the death of DriveTribe, but at least we now get a Porsche 917 for 917 users.

Edit: And it's already up to 918, but the Porsche 918 is good too.

@bandit Can you fit a wedding dress comfortably in that car?

I guess so...

@cb

I recomment https://despair.com/ if you haven't seen it yet. They have great demotivational posters.

@Dalton-like-from-Roadhouse

I can think of many roads in Florida where that sign would be useful. I was visiting my father in Sarasota three weeks ago, and I regularly saw people driving miles with their turn signal on.

@sampsonite24

Did the airbags go off? If not, it may not be too bad to fix.

@MidEngine

Since I work for Microsoft, I figure I might as well drink the Kool-Aid.

@SamV8

Jay Ohrberg built this.

@UpCreekwithShitPaddle

@Cé-hé-sin

Banana, pineapple and watermelon

@Fish-McSticks

@XJDano

I had a 1991 Saturn SL for over 120,000 miles with no significant issues. The SW2 will have the twin-cam engine, which was about 124 hp new. The car should weigh no more than 2500 pounds, so the power will be reasonable. The manual transmission helps even more.

Go for it. It's a good price.

@MasterMario

Are the Twizy and Multipla sharing the same space? It looks like a handicapped space. If two cars share a handicapped space, does only one need the right approval?

@MidEngine

Didn't you even try to Google it?