I also do not like and cannot stop German cars, so they will combine well with this theme day. Thus follows my lukewarm rant, informed by 25 years in the German car repair business:
German cars are garbage. I hate them professionally and they have robbed me of my enthusiasm. BMW has not made a worthwhile car since about 2005, and are now nothing more than lifestyle accessories built to be leased by (redacted) and thrown away. The only Mercedes of the last 20 years that I am willing to defend are E-class sedans and wagons, depending on engine, and excluding 4Matics. All SLs after the Pagoda are garbage. Every 2.0T VWAG product sucks. Manual transmission, normally aspirated gas Golfs, MkIV R32s, and pre-scandal TDIs are the only good VWs from this century. VW has never figured out how to make a good transverse automatic, but DSGs are ok. Eurovans suck. The only good Audis have 5 cylinders. The only good Porsches have transaxles, regardless of engine placement or cooling. Boxsters and 996s are only a bargain until you have to fix them. The 997 is just a 996 with a better interior. The Cayman renders the 911 obsolete. All Porsche parts are too expensive. All modern German diesels are bad and no amount of torque or fuel economy can justify the repair costs. All German manufacturers treat independent shops like criminals.
I have owned at least
10 15 16 German cars from all main brands spanning 1968 to 2004 models and still have... some... two of which are not my fault because they were free... but I sometimes/often/daily wish I just had a nice old Toyota and garage space for bicycles. To better understand my current and ongoing apathy, observe: I have a running, registered old German sporty car in the garage that I could drive at any time but usually don't, because a) I am perfectly happy driving my beat up little Nissan truck until the end of time or next Wednesday, whichever comes first, b) I straight up cannot afford to buy most parts for the sporty German car even at my cost, so I fear driving it which rather takes the fun out of it, and c) it just always needs work and at this point the last thing I want to do at the end of the day is work on my own car. Also d) I feel like a selfish dickhead in the old German sporty car and I don't think I'm a selfish dickhead.
Buy a Toyota. If you want leather, buy a Lexus. If you don't like the way they look, buy a Honda. This has been your German car theme day Friday PSA from your grizzled, jaded, burnt out professional German car person. My catharsis thanks you for your time.