To each and every one of you.

I doubt I will ever be able to express my gratitude to you all for all your help and support.

You guys give me hope and allow me to see that there is still a lot of good in the world. Thank you all for your support and for being wonderful people, it truly means the world to me to have people I can turn to when life is falling apart.

So thank you. All of you. I really appreciate it.

Well, it's a done deal.
The Pacifica is mine and they cut me a check to leave my 94 there.
Win win.

It's very odd to not have my 94 sitting in this parking spot.

A recent post/discussion got me thinking more about something most people neglect in the world today, mental health.

I know a lot of people here suffer from depression/anxiety, I know I am one of them.
It gets better and worse on the day to day.

I have personally been in a downfall recently after our trip to Florida. Just an utter state of nothing matters anymore, not end it bad, but F-everything right now.

It's a terrible place to be and an even harder place to pull out of. I find burying myself in something I love gets me through most of the time. For me, that's doing things with my kids, working on something (modifying), and/or spending time with friends.

The key is to not let all hope slip away and realize that there is always someone there who does in fact need and care about you. Sometimes you just someone to talk to, that's where this community is great. We all have different needs and interests, we sometimes disagree, but in general I feel we all truly care about each others well being.
Just knowing there is this kind of support out there when you think all is lost can be a great help, just knowing you can vent when needed is as well.

Just a little PSA that we are all here for you when you need help, all one has to do is ask.

So here goes.
She started life as a plain jane 3.0/3-speed base model 94 Voyager.
Over the last 10 years or so, she's been upgraded and updated to better suit my needs of towing, hauling, camping, off roading, etc.

This whole "build" started as a joke over a friend of mine looking for a push bar for his Subaru. I was in the middle of getting it ready for paint, had already dropped it 1.5", and had no plans of making an off-roader, but we built a bar to pick on him.
This set the stage for insanity as I ordered the largest 14" ATs I could fit and finished the paint
I ended up snagging a Jeep Commander roof basket and rolling like this for a few years, even snagging some awards at a few shows

Then around 205k miles, the 3-speed decided it was done with the abuse and started losing 2nd gear. In no mood to continue with this driveline now, I swapped it for a 3.8l/4-speed out of a 94 Grand Voyager
I fixed the slapped on intake and drove it like this for a few years. Then the 3.8L lost a PCV, pressurized the crankcase, and pushed all it's oil out while cruising down the interstate. With the 3.8 dead, I searched for another but ended up only finding a 92 3.3L.
Needing to be able to drive it, I swapped it in

This engine combined with the 3.8 trans made the van even slower than the 3.0/3-speed, so I kept my eyes peeled for another 3.8 to replace it.
In the mean time, I got ambitious and designed/built a 2" lift kit, along with painting it once again as I grew tired of the color.

With the new paint on and buffed out, I went back to driving it for a couple years, swapped the transfer gears in an attempt to make the 3.3L livable, until finally I stumbled on a steal for a 99 3.8L.
I rebuilt the 3.8L and freshened it up so it would be good to rock

Then in it went.
This finally left me with the power/torque the van should have had from factory, so I was happy to cruise it as it was. Along the way I rebuilt/upgraded the rear suspension to handle the towing/hauling we were doing. 1,450lb rated springs from General Spring and a modified Curt hitch

The added receivers gave me a place to build my spare tire carrier and a place to mount my winch when needed
In the process of driving and enjoying it, I got feisty and built a new snorkel for it by modifying a Land Cruiser snorkel kit

With the new-found power/torque, the poor 94 trans couldn't handle the abuse any longer, so I sent it out to Kutzler transmissions and had it built to handle what I throw at it. While I was awaiting the transmission, I decided to shed a new light on it's look as well. So I fixed up the couple small rust spots, got it all sanded out one last time , installed my freshly built transmission, then set into laying out the new color

Have even been doing some local events having even more fun with it, Even managing to bury it in 18" deep ruts


Along the way it got a couple interior additions like a new headliner and the overhead console
Along with some custom airbrushing

Now the plan is to just enjoy it with the family as much as we can.

One of them happens to be a 2019 Pacifica S..........
Yes, I will obviously get better pics once it's daylight.

Picked it up last night and unloaded the old van without any screwing around, they already had everything drawn up, so they just cut us a check for the Voyager and we left it there.

As most of you know already, things haven't been good in my marriage for quite some time.
This has recently come to a head when I realized the toll it was taking on my kids and my own mental health.

Things have been spiraling quite quickly and she has threatened leaving numerous times, yet every morning she wakes up messaging me like nothing has happened.

I know I am going to have to be a horrible person to get her to finally realize it is in fact over, but that absolutely kills me to do.
We had it out Monday night and she was going to pack her bags and move back in with her parents, but after listening to her cry for 3 hours, being in my own head about dealing with life and the kids on my own, and feeling terrible for saying what needed to be said, I got up and broke down and apologized.

I can't stay with her anymore, she brings me nothing but anger and emptiness, but I can't bring myself to be enough of an ass for her to get the hint.

Why does this have to be so hard?
I don't want to lock my emotions back up, I've spent too long feeling nothing.

My therapist straight up asked me how I have managed to stay with her as long as I have. He told me she is just manipulating me into staying because she knows she is going to lose everything, but it still kills me. Even if she is just pretending, it kills me to see someone hurting.

I wish it was easier to find the strength to do what I need to do right now. I had it in the bag Monday night, then the realities and my over thinking everything took over and I broke down.

After driving 1.5 hours Friday to look at the blue GT https://opposite-lock.com/topic/61606/i-think-this-is-it?_=1669636996806 , walking away without even starting it, then spending the rest of the day driving around to Milwaukee dealerships and coming up empty, we headed homeward, chatting along the way.

We got talking about the Pacifica about Madison, so we decided to stop at the dealer we got our 2018 from and go for a drive.

The one they had was a fully loaded Limited with all the options. Ignoring most of the options, I focused on the things that matter to me, and away we went.

Upon returning from our drive and chatting with the salesman, we decided to change gears with our search.

So Saturday we went and looked at this little beauty: https://www.zimbrickhyundaiwest.com/used-Madison-2019-Chrysler-Pacifica-Touring+Plus+FWD-2C4RC1FGXKR708662

This one happens to have the S package, happens to be in a wonderful color, and has all the options I want.
So tonight I'm heading in to make it mine.

Harald is an older German gentleman whom I work with. He drives this to work daily with the exception of salt months.
He has a 45 min drive one way, he says it's the most comfortable car he owns.

Mind you, he also owns a 1998 Audi A8L 4.2L (which I absolutely love) and a 1999 SL500 AMG.... which I'll try to get pics of when he has them here.

Got the Black laid Friday Complete with my oldest daughter who came with to help in the progress.
We let that dry overnight, then masked off the black, and laid on the Grey.
Let it dry for a couple hours before pulling tape, putting lights back in, and creeping it home.
Later that night I reinstalled most of my accessories.
Then I finally reinstalled the roof basket before bed last night after giving everything the day to cure and flow out.
Now I just have to decide on pinstripe color.

I'm thinking a blue of some sort to tie my blue interior into the paint scheme, but my daughter doesn't think it'll look right.
She wants me to use the same silver/black stripe I used prior, but I think it'll be lost to the paint.

Not gonna lie, I'm really enjoying the Rally Van's new look.
I added the thin blue pinstripes and painted my emblems. Need to grab some blue paint to paint the lettering on the other emblems before I get them on.

Then I just gotta get to the yard to pull my CC switch, driver's footwell plastic, and outer door seals.

@HFV_Junkyardin That's an entirely different class of vehicle though.
I get your point, but I'm just looking at what $17k buys for a modern 5 passenger AWD with under 30k miles and it's not much.
Even less of it will be as efficient, cheap to operate, or cool as this little Colt.

@HFV_Junkyardin @orneryduck

I'll give you guys the same scenario I give other people:

Find me another 24k mile vehicle in this condition that can do everything this little car can do for less money while still ticking the "oppo" box.

While $17k seems high at a glance or a knee jerk, $17k doesn't really buy much these days, especially for anything under 30k miles.
The cheapest AWD CUVs start at $25k.

@bbg2d I would guess cost saving.
A simple housing + cheapo filament bulb is likely far cheaper than a good led unit.

@bbg2d They are actually quite a bit brighter than stock. So I'd say not only improved looks, but improved safety as well. Win Win.

@bbg2d
Here ya go.

@winterlegacy The Pacifica has more 2nd and 3rd row leg room than the GC/TC.

I've never rode in the passenger seat to comment, but my 6'6"/325lb friend is entirely comfortable riding shotgun. He says my Pacifica is more comfortable for him than our GC.

@ash78 I have power doors and hatch on my Pacifica, but our GC does not.
We specifically looked for a GC without due to the failure rate on power sliders across all brands.

Oddly enough, the non power sliders open almost effortlessly. If the kids are small enough they can't open the slider, chances are their parent is carrying them and can open the door anyway.

My big reason for like the TC wasn't features or price, it was driving dynamic. The TC drove soooooo much better than any of the other minivans on the market and it was actually minivan sized.

While some people care about features and tech, a lot of people still want a simple/reliable vehicle that does the job and still drives well.
The TC is a great example. Ford never intended on selling many. Ford never advertised them. They barely updated them. Yet the TCs sold quicker than they could hit the lot and people actively search them out to buy them.

That kind of following tells me that maybe tech/feature laden behemoths might not be what the market actually wants.

@ash78 said in Well, those are in now too:

@CoolMinivan-Nobody The biggest mistake Ford ever made was failing to put the Focus RS drivetrain in there.

Said nobody ever, who wasn't a member of Oppo.

Power has always been the biggest complaint on it, even amongst "normies". Ford heard this complaint and showed how much they cared by switching to a smaller less powerful engine for the last couple years of production.

I would venture to guess if they'd have offered it with a turbo 4 or a small V6, they'd have sold far more of them.

@mhr555 If they could be had with a better driveline, I would have been all over a Transit Connect.
They drive wonderfully overall, but the 4 cylinders leave them feeling far too sluggish, even in normal driving. It's the biggest reason we didn't buy one years ago and it's why they were quickly off the list this time as well.

I buy things I enjoy driving and I wouldn't enjoy the lack of power every day.

@amoore100 Agreed.
I am extremely happy with it, so much so that I have yet to even think about missing my Voyager, and that's a tough order.