@K-Roll-PorscheTamer Taking care of a thankless family member, especially one who once gave you priceless parental love, can be soul-crushing. And especially because all roads quite certainly lead to the same outcome. Losing agency over your personal life is scary indeed.
I have no advice nor any profoundly comforting words other than to get as much help as you can find and afford, and beyond that just do what you can. Try not to beat yourself up too hard over something that isn't your fault.
Seems like you had already been unknowingly dealing with this problem since the Kinja days, doesn't it.
For whatever it's worth, we're here to try to help you fight the good fight. Whatever decreases your (you and your mom) workload is worth considering.